Monday, April 21, 2014

Resolve to Know More... What is Infertility


The simplest way to explain "infertility" is the inability to naturally conceive a child, but there is so much more to it than this.  There is no website or book that can truly explain what it means to be infertile.  If you’re not infertile, you can never really, 100%, understand the concept.  Even an infertile person cannot always grasp the full extent of what infertility is to another person.  To me, it is a personal story, a personal experience, it can be related to by others, but your definition is just that, yours.  The beautiful thing about it is that there are so many unique and inspiring stories out there. 


First off, infertility does not define me, there is a lot more to me than just being infertile, but I do advocate for it & accept that it is part of my life.  I’m open about our journey; I share my pain, my frustration, my thoughts, my fears, and so much more on my blog.  My Instagram is chalk-full of photos and quotes about it.  Infertility is a lot of tears, anger, confusion, heartache, & letdown; it’s a whole lot of disappointment & negativity.  Its feeling like you might be less of a woman or a wife because you can’t give your partner a child.  It’s jealousy of others who can get pregnant without sticking a needle in their abdomen.  It’s a lot of waiting.  So much waiting.  It's constantly reminding yourself not to give up, which is a challenge within itself. It's so hard when you think back on how long you've been on this path and although you've made strides, big strides, you still haven't gotten where you wanted to be, and you never really know if you'll get there.  It can be a huge struggle when things don't go how you are expecting them to and you have to take steps back and revise the plan.  I would say that is what the majority of the journey is, revising the process, learning what works and what doesn't, and becoming stronger and stronger with each cycle.  


The more individualized part about infertility is treatment, are you taking Clomid, are you using injections, what kind of progesterone are you taking, how many procedures have you had, how many tests or surgeries do you have, have you lost pregnancies or was your first try successful?  Are you looking into adoption, or egg donors, or surrogacy?  This part of the journey is different for every one of us.  But here is where we can all relate again, what we want in the end, is a healthy baby in our arms.  We are all after the same dream, the same goal.  Some will be fortunate enough to achieve that dream and some won’t, that is a harsh reality. 



I am confident that we will achieve our goal.  I feel like IVF will be the way to get us that baby that we want.  Although we are all on our own individual paths towards a baby, we all have the desire to become a parent.  What I want is for someone who doesn't know much about infertility to be able to understand that infertility is an entire culture of its own.  We are a tight-knit community.  We form on of a kind friendships, we send each other care packages, we support each other, and it’s a beautiful thing.   If you are just starting down your own path of infertility, know that there is SO MUCH support out there, any question that you have can be answered and has been asked by someone else just like you.  I encourage you to search out this amazing community, we are pretty easy to find and there are more of us than you can ever imagine. 


If you would like to know more about NIAW or about the disease of infertility click these links below:
www.resolve.org/infertility101

6 comments:

  1. This was so beautifully written! I love your honesty and willingness to share your story. You are such an inspiration to others. I am so excited & anxious for the day that you are finally blessed with the baby you are fighting so hard to have! :-)

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  2. This is just perfect! It explains all of this exactly as it is :)

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  3. Perfect. We really are a tight knit community of people fighting for the same outcome. I do not know how I could get through this without the encouragement I receive from people I have never even met. You are such an inspiration. I know I tell you that A LOT, but you really are!

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  4. Don't be ashamed of your story and never giving up are key!!!! Thanks for those reminders girl!

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  5. I love this post. I wish you luck

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