Last night Georgia and I were both in tears. She was hungry, I was tired, and we were both frustrated. I'm pretty sure I nursed her 5-6 times within 4 hours and nothing seemed to be satisfying her. It was rough and the hormones definitely don't help the situation but after I finally bit the bullet and let her nurse off my left side which is in excruciating pain from a bad crack, she was satiated and we were both able to finally get some sleep. My instincts were telling me that she had nursed too much on the right and wasn't getting enough. I was right, I wish I would've realized it sooner.
Luckily most of our nights have been the opposite of this. Georgia is a champ at nursing and sleeping. She's sleeping through the night and I'm waking her to feed about every 3-4 hours. I've been getting great sleep myself, something I never expected to happen in these early days and I'm taking full advantage because I know those days are probably numbered. I've been a mom now for 16 days and these 16 days have flown by, even just sitting around doing nothing but staring at her or watching countless reruns of Friends on Netflix, I'm soaking in as much as I possibly can because every day she changes so much.
You might be wondering how on Earth I have time to type up a blog post, I kinda wonder that myself but she is currently fed and napping in her rock n play so I figured I'd take a quick moment to do an update. I've been lucky that my parents have been over practically every day which gives me a chance to shower, do a load of laundry, eat an uninterrupted meal, etc. we just really miss Joe and hope that he gets to be done with the outage soon. We are ready to spend some time as a family of three. He's actually more exhausted right now than I am!
I've definitely had my bouts of crying and my moments of frustration but Georgia is seriously a great baby who rarely ever fusses unless she's hungry. I love getting her dressed in cute outfits every day and putting a little bow on her head, I never imagined I'd actually get to be on this side of our infertility journey and enjoying what it's like to be the mom to a daughter. Joe said to me the other day, "can you believe we have a baby" and it feels so surreal that we actually do HAVE A BABY. We are so in love with her & everything about being her parents, the hard times and the good times.
For those wondering, I am recovering really well from the c-section. I'm less than 10 pounds away from my pre-pregnancy weight and everything else is healing well. I've been released to drive, to do yoga, and to walk so I'm hoping we get some warm weather during my weeks off so that we can take some walks outside. I'm already 2 weeks into my 8 week maternity leave, but I'm taking an additional week of vacation at the end so I won't be going back to work until around the first week of May. The time is already passing too quickly and it will be over in no time I'm sure. That being said, I'm off to go tend to my babe.
Quickly though, for anyone still struggling, or anyone considering donor eggs, embryos, sperm, adoption, or surrogacy, DO IT. Just do it, don't worry about "what if she/he doesn't look like me", don't worry about the fact that the DNA of your child isn't yours, all of that worry will be nothing but an afterthought and I can tell you it was 100% worth the time, the money, the tears, the frustrations, the losses, the pain, all of it, for THIS girl.